|My last night working the spotlight for The Will Rogers Follies.|
how to build a manhow to build a man by albern
this is how you build a man
(you cannot build a woman,
as they are tricky and build themselves.)
you must first glut yourself on motherlove.
know that motherlove is deep and dangerous,
and if you think it too risky, wine will do.
(if you have a good source of motherlove, sell it.
then you'll have no need to build a man.)
drink until you swell and belch.
then eat --
olives and oranges and day-old lamb,
pomegranate seeds (save a few).
fennel and parsley will clear your head.
when you cannot take another bite,
take two and three and stop.
now you can build a man,
one that will last, listen
love and never lose a thing.
these are certain objects novices use:
beewax, dog bones, rose petals and moonblood.
these are not reliable.
(those men are delicate and overwrought
and will melt if left in the car.)
beg a barber for a bag of hair
buy an old leather coat.
break the wineglass, sticky with juice
the plate and pomegranates.
bury this in a pinewood box.
a real man does not require spells or pot